Forgiveness

I received the following devotion in my email yesterday:

Nancy Leigh DeMoss: It can take more than forgiveness to heal a broken relationship.

“Finally! I’ve forgiven her, but I don’t ever want to have anything to do with her again.”

Nancy: When someone has sinned against us and a relationship has been severed, forgiveness is a necessary starting place. But that initial act of releasing the offender has got to be followed up with a commitment to invest in his or her life. That investment will help us to experience healing and wholeness. Listen to Jesus’ words in Luke 6. He said, “Love your enemies, do good to those who hate you, bless those who curse you, pray for those who abuse you.” Listen, the goal is to rebuild the relationship.
Even in situations where it is not appropriate to reconnect, we can still invest in other people’s lives through prayer. What are some practical ways you can return good for evil? Ask the Lord to show you how you can invest in the lives of those who caused you pain.
(Revive Our Hearts, Nancy Leigh DeMoss)

A few years ago, I was betrayed in a relationship. I haven’t really thought about the person much recently and if you asked me, I would say that I have forgiven him. Certainly I have “released” him, as Nancy DeMoss puts it. But this devotion struck me, especially Jesus’ admonition to “pray for those who abuse you.” It is not enough in God’s eyes to say we’ve forgiven and move on. We are to actively seek good in our enemy’s life. I was convicted that I should pray for the person who had hurt me. I prayed that my forgiveness of him would be complete and that God would work in his life to bring him back into a right relationship with Him. That He would be so uncomfortable in his sin that he would repent and return to God. That God would bring good into his life. That I would be able to return good for evil.

A few hours after making this prayer, I found out that the person who hurt me has taken even more overt action to embrace his sin and publicly declare it. Could it be a coincidence that I found this out the very same day I prayed for him, when I haven’t heard anything about him in months? I don't think so. It seems much more like a test to see if I truly do forgive him and wish him good. It seems like God is forcing me to fully acknowledge this person’s behavior by confronting me with undeniable evidence of the choices he's been making. After all, we cannot forgive that which we do not acknowledge.

I think of Jesus, forgiving those who crucified Him. Luke 23:34 says, “Jesus said, ‘Father, forgive them, for they do not know what they are doing.’” Jesus could have used the fact that these people did not know what they were doing to excuse their sin against Him; after all, they did not realize the full extent of the evil they were committing. But instead Jesus acknowledges what they did to Him, asks God to forgive them, and then does the greatest thing anyone has ever done to show good to their enemies – He dies in our place.

I am amazed that God would see fit to remind me of the forgiveness I have received on a day where I would be confronted by my need to truly forgive my enemy. “Freely you have received, freely give” (Matt. 10:8).