Get Thee Behind Me, Satan

I struggle with an anxiety disorder, originally brought on by extreme stress that my mind and body didn't know what to do with.  Unfortunately, anxiety attacks have now become my body's default response to any issue that pops up in my life.  I am slowly learning to identify triggers to the attacks and I am hopeful that eventually I can retrain my body not to overreact every time something out of the ordinary happens.

Now that I can recognize a few of the issues that bring on my anxiety, I need to be mindful to cast these anxieties on my God who cares for me (1 Peter 5:7).  With a business trip to Miami this week and leaving for Kenya on Saturday, I am definitely feeling a bit anxious (especially since flying scares me).  Of course, God had something to say about that and spoke to me through Saturday's Jesus Calling entry: "Strive to trust Me in more and more areas of your life.  Anything that tends to make you anxious is a growth opportunity.  Instead of running away from these challenges, embrace them, eager to gain all the blessings I have hidden in the difficulties.  If you believe that I am sovereign over every aspect of your life, it is possible to trust Me in all situations."

Now of course I've also been doing Beth Moore's study, Believing God.  I wear a blue bracelet on my right hand to remind of the fact that I believe God is who He says He is and that He can do what He says He can do.  I do not serve a small god.  I serve the God who performs miracles (Ps. 77:14)!  With this message coming at me from all sides (even in yesterday's sermon), how can I excuse my anxiety?  God has everything under control.  And not just under control, but perfectly orchestrated to work something beautiful in my life, to give me hope and a future. 

So, Anxiety, you will not be my master.  You will be an opportunity for me to further test my faith and see God come through, true to His promises.  I choose to see you as a weakness that makes God's power more evident.  With Paul, I say, "I delight in weaknesses, in insults, in hardships, in persecutions, in difficulties. For when I am weak, then I am strong" (1 Cor. 12:10). 

This will not be easy; it is a weakness, after all.  And I know that my own strength is not even enough to enable my mind to follow the desire of my heart.  So I fling myself on Christ and ask Him to guard my heart and mind (Phil. 4:7), to give me grace to trust Him more.